i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize