Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize