she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
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I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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