Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize