Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.

(1-904): View more from Florida

It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.

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(904): I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling. (1-904): It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that. http://tfl.nu/i3bg

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(732): View more from New Jersey

used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick

(732): View more from New Jersey

i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.

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(732): used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick (732): i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore. http://tfl.nu/4czg

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(410): View more from Maryland

my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"

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(410): my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts" http://tfl.nu/2c0p

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.

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(201): Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision. http://tfl.nu/ohzv

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(519): View more from Ontario

Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.

(416): View more from Toronto

Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!

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(519): Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit. (416): Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?! http://tfl.nu/iavy

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(845): View more from New York

alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.

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(845): alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization. http://tfl.nu/1m6d

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(773): View more from Illinois

Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes

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(773): Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes http://tfl.nu/y66v

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(765): View more from Indiana

did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...

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(765): did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me... http://tfl.nu/7ye0

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(469): View more from Texas

I will probably be peed on at some point today.

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(469): I will probably be peed on at some point today. http://tfl.nu/flw0

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(808): View more from Hawaii

So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.

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(808): So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend? (832): Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required. http://tfl.nu/6w8v

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(742): View more from

All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.

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(742): All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat. http://tfl.nu/3hf2

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(907): View more from Alaska

I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.

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(907): I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup. http://tfl.nu/rbz2

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(303): View more from Colorado

Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.

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(303): Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of. http://tfl.nu/nhk5

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(703): View more from Virginia

I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams

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(703): I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams http://tfl.nu/mq8g

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."

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(303): I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions." http://tfl.nu/0cl8

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