The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize