i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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