Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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