there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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