Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
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