I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
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