Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
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do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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