I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
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I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize