Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize