I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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