I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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