My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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