Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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