I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
where does the pee come out of this thing
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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