I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
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normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Im part way to drunk.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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