Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize