epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize