My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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