life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
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ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
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He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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