You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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