Christians are straight up FREAKS
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't watch enough power rangers
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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