why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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