Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
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I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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