Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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