So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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