haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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