Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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