I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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