It's like God shit irony all over that family
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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