So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
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Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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