I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize