so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
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