Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize