Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
her vagine was all disorganized.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize