oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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