Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize