im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize