I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
did you just send me my own nude
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize