I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize