new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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