I saw his package. It spoke to me.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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