I wish I could teleport
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize