Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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