i always forget guys have bellybuttons
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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