remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize